It Is What It Is
by laurenventi
Summary: Rory's graduation from Yale, what if Jess showed up? Oneshot.


**A/N: This is my first oneshot ever! Yay! Don't be too harsh, remember constructive criticism! Lol, :D**

**Disclaimer: The only thing I have in common with ASP is that we're both females. Lol, :D.**

**-------**

The last time she was sitting up on stage dressed like this she was graduating from Chilton. Now Yale. Everything was basically the same, Lorelei, Luke, Sookie and Emily and Richard were all there. With the addition of Lane and Logan. Lorelei was still distracting her by holding up notes on pieces of paper even though she's suppose to be paying attention. The last one said 'August 15th'. Rory had smiled and as usual had gotten sidetracked from the ceremony. August 15th had referred to the date Lorelei had been trying to get Luke to commit to for days. She didn't even notice until Lorelei had signaled to the podium that they were calling name for their names. Rory glares at Lorelei and hurries over to the line near the podium. Lor catches her attention again and scowls at her. Rory looks shocked and mouths, 'Your fault!' Lor looks appallingly at Sookie. Rory laughs and tries to re-focus on the ceremony. They were only on the D's. Dubach. Gales Dubach. She'd always wondered what kind of name it was, until--Once again she's distracted by Lorelei this time holding up 'What kind of name is that? Dubach?' Rory looks shocked. 'Parents!' She mouths, making the mistake of signaling to the man and woman in front of Lor's row. They turn around and face Lor, who quickly puts the sign down.

"Hi."

They face the front again and Lorelei sticks her tongue out at their backs. Rory rolls her eyes and watches as Emily scolds Lorelei, no doubt, for being too childish.

"Paris Eustace Gellar." Stunned at how quickly the line moves up Rory moves forward as Paris collects her diploma and faces the front for a picture.

"Lorelei Leigh Gilmore." Even though she's done this before, her heart beats faster. This would be her last time doing this. She shakes the dean's hand and thanks him as he congratulates her. She walks over to the center of the stage and moves her tassel to the other side of her cap as Sookie snaps a picture. She smiles as Lorelei sticks her tongue out and does the same.

"Lorelei!" Emily scolds once again.

"I taught her everything I know." Lorelei responds quickly.

Rory's smile fades as her cerulean blues meet familiar chocolate brown eyes. She stumbles along as someone pulls her down off the stage. Paris.

"This is it Gilmore." Paris starts.

"Seriously? Cause frankly I was getting a little tired of you showing up everywhere." Rory says sardonically.

"Really this time, but I might just have to show up at the New York Times just to see your reaction." She counters.

Rory smiles." Good." They hug. When they pull away Lorelei taps on Rory's shoulder. Rory spins around and faces her. "I missed most of the ceremony because of you, mister!" She starts jokingly.

Lorelei looks appalled. "Not true!" She smiles giving herself away. "You did it." She starts seriously this time.

"I did, didn't I?"

"Yea and you got a big, fancy diploma in the process. Again." She adds as an afterthought. They hug. When they break away, Lorelei finally notices Paris. "Hey, Paris. Congratulations."

"Thanks Lorelei." Beat. "Well, I should go, we're having mac and cheese again."

"Why does that not surprise me?" Rory laughs. "Bye."

"Bye."

"Such a nice kid." Lorelei comments as Paris walks off.

"We're talking about Paris." Rory says as if Lorelei didn't know.

"So that's why it sounded so wrong." Lor counters sarcastically.

Then Sookie and the elder Gilmores were approaching. "Rory!"

She didn't know who it was coming from, Emily or Sookie? Probably Sookie.

"Hey." Then there were more hugs and soon more 'congratulations' were going around again.

"Guess what?" Emily says excitedly.

"What?" Rory asks.

"We have a surprise for you."

"It's not another car is it?" Rory says half jokingly.

"What if it was?" Emily asks offended.

"I don't need another one."

"It's not a car." Richard tells her. "Maybe even better."

"You're going to give away the whole secret." Emily warns him.

"I am not!" Richard rolls his eyes at his wife.

Emily sighs frustrated and turns back to Rory. "So, we'll see you at dinner tonight and tell you the surprise there." She smiles wickedly.

Rory smiles to cover her surprise and looks at Lorelei who has the same smile with the words 'who agreed to dinner?' all over it.

"Great." Rory turns back to Emily. "I can't wait." Lorelei snickers. "And neither can mom." She adds. Lorelei glares.

"And Lorelei since Rory's bringing Logan, its only fair for you to bring Luke." Emily adds last minute. Like everything else.

"I can?" Lorelei asks surprised.

"I am?" So is Rory.

"She is?" Like I said, she's surprised.

"Where is Logan anyway?" Richard speaks up.

"Ah, I'm not sure." She looks around. "He's around here somewhere."

"Is Luke here today Lorelei?" Emily asks sweetly.

"Yes, mom." She can see right through her.

"Really? I didn't see him." Liar.

"You sat in the same row as him. Two seats over in fact."

"What a coincidence! He should talk more often…" She continues.

"He tried to, you told him it was impolite to talk during the—"Lorelei tries to explain.

Emily cuts her off. "Well see you both at dinner. Come along Richard." Emily turns and walks away.

"Right behind you Emily." He follows.

Lorelei sighs and faces Rory. "Ladies and gentlemen, my parents."

"I think I've met them before." Rory plays along.

"They're just that big, they needed a reintroduction."

"Oh, gotcha."

"Hey there's my graduate." Logan appears behind her. "I've been looking for you everywhere."

"Cause I'm really that hard to spot with this cap and gown." Rory counters.

"I'm telling ya, Ace." Beat. "Hey Lorelei."

"Logan." She greets. "I'm going to go find Luke." She walks away as Rory nods.

"So how does it feel to be a graduate, to be rid of Yale?"

"Huh! How can you say that? This is where we met!"

"The only good think out of all this." He counters.

She hits him playfully. "I'm hoping to have a little more time for…"

"You are getting more and more out of hand every time I see you, Ace."

Rory laughs. "I was going to say—"

He cuts her off again. "Us."

"No—"

He cuts her off by kissing her this time. Suddenly remember what had happened earlier she turns so that he gets her cheek. "Ouch, that bad?"

"No, no, I just, remembered…something, I have to do." Rory says hesitantly.

"Okay." He nods.

"I'll see you tonight."

"What?" He's confused.

"For dinner." It doesn't register. "Grandparents." She tries again. "Logan." She pouts.

"Fine." She smiles. "Its not because of the pout." She nods. "Don't think you have some kind of hold on me or something." He continues.

"Okay." She walks a few feet when her phone goes off. She slowly spins around as if she can see if they're around her before answering. "Hello." Silence. She can't help but think 'déjà vu' all over again. She walks a few more feet. "Jess." She didn't know when her breathing started coming out so ragged.

"Hey."

She thought she wanted him to answer, but now that he did her breathing got worse. "I thought that was you, but…I wasn't sure, if I was hallucinating or not." She says just for something to say.

"You weren't, turn around."

Before she even does she knows he's there. There was always something about him, his aura or whatever, that was so strong she could always tell when he was around. She closes her phone and turns around and he's already putting his phone in his pocket. She had forgotten how good he looked. He looked different since the last time she saw him. His hair was shorter and spiked like she'd always known it to be, but it was dangerously low. Lower than he had ever had it before. She liked it.

"Let me save you the trouble. I came to see you graduate." He starts.

He knew she'd been about to ask him what he was doing here. He'd always known her. That wasn't what surprised her. It was his answer.

"Why?"

"I don't know." He shrugs. "Partly because I wanted to, I don't know, make up for missing the last one and partly because I wanted to see how…everyone was doing." He finishes.

Rory nods knowingly. She searches for something to say. "Its good to see you, I'm glad you came." It's the best she can come up with on such short notice.

"Really?" He asks skeptically.

"Really." She assures him.

"Good."

"Yea and you're actually wearing a tie so that's good too." She adds.

"You think so, cause I was really hesitant about that."

"I bet you were."

They share a smile that they hadn't shared in what felt like ages.

"So, how are you?" He asks.

"I'm good. I'm happy, so I'm good." He nods. "How are you? Write anymore books lately? How's Truncheon?" Realization dawns on her and she scolds herself. "God, I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Jess assures her.

"I'm promised myself that if I ever saw you again I wouldn't mention it. Not that I was hoping and praying or that I wanted to see you. I mean I do, but I wasn't praying or anything. Its good to see you. But back to the Truncheon thing, I'm sorry and I know I've said it before but I'm saying it again. God, I'm such an idiot! You look good. Jesus, I just said that aloud didn't I? I swear I don't know what's wrong with me. I never talk this much and I know that's hard to believe but I don't. Not anymore at least. Except around you. Jesus. I 'm talking to much again, right? I'll shut up now." She looks down.

"That was actually a minute and a half." He tells her seriously.

"Sorry."

"Rory, come on. I was joking." He tilts her head up to meet his eyes.

"Oh, right."

"Its okay to ask me about Truncheon. It's doing pretty good actually. As for the rest, lets see…" He ponders. "…I was hoping and praying to see you again. You look good too, and you don't have to shut up I like when you talk. It gives me a reason to look at your lips without seeming totally perverted." He admits.

Rory tucks her hair behind her ear. "Was it really a minute and thirty seconds?"

She's changing the subject and he knows it. "Give or take a few seconds." He tells her. "I wasn't sure if it was okay to get you a gift or not because of how it'd look." He says hesitantly.

"You don't have to get me one. I'm actually kind of glad you didn't because then I'd feel obligated to paying you back."

He smirks. "Who said I didn't?" Rory goes to say something, but he cuts her off. "I said I wasn't sure, doesn't mean I didn't get something."

She smiles. "What'd you get?"

"I thought you didn't want it." He asks her knowingly.

"That was when I thought you didn't have anything now that I know that you do," She holds her hand out. "Hand it over."

"So bossy." He laughs handing over a package from inside his jacket. She opens it and sees 'Great Expectations by Jess Mariano'.

"You wrote another book?" She cuts herself off this time. He's holding up a blue heart fresh water pendant in front of her.

"I thought it would be a little too much but I said 'what the hell' and bought it anyway." Jess says handing it to her. She takes it hesitantly and examines it in her hand and looks up unexpectedly.

"Take it back." She pushes it back in his hand.

"What?" He laughs.

"Its too much!" She turns and walks away. "The book is fine. Thank you."

"What?" He quickly follows her. "I don't understand." He turns her by her elbow.

"There is nothing to understand! I said its too much, so its too much." She turns on her heel again.

"Rory, come on. Don't walk away."

"What exactly am I suppose to do Jess? Hug you? Jump into your arms and thank you?" She reels off suggestions.

"Frankly, I think it'd be a little churlish of you not to." Jess responds jokingly. Rory glares and turns again. "Okay." He jogs to catch up and spins in front of her. "That one was my fault." He admits. Rory folds her arms and looks down. "Just take the necklace." He tries again.

"I can't!" They're causing a scene.

"Why the hell not? And don't give me any of that 'its too much' bull!" He's getting frustrated.

"Because I wouldn't be able to explain it if I wore it! And if I didn't wear it, then what's the point right? I mean what would I say? You're not my friend and we're not dating, so why am I wearing your necklace? What are you?" She rants.

"Your adversary." He counters sarcastically, but once again his smirk fades. "Rory, come on. Why do you care so much what people think?"

"Because…" She's squirming under his gaze.

"Because why?" He repeats.

"Because, okay! Because, because. That's who I am. That's how I function. And if you don't like it that's just too damn bad!" She turns to walk off for the last time, but stops abruptly upon seeing Lorelei standing there. And Luke and Sookie. And Emily and Richard were back. And Lane. And just about everybody in the parking lot was looking at them. And Logan was back. And everyone is watching him to gauge is reaction. Rory looks at Logan and sees him walking toward Jess. She turns back and Jess is watching Logan. He turns and looks at Rory, then back at Logan as he backs away and walks off. Rory goes after him but feels a hand on her arm. She spins around and sees Lorelei.

"Don't cause a scene."

"I will if you don't let go of my arm." Rory responds already annoyed. Lorelei lets go and Rory backs away looking at everybody gauging their reaction. She looks to Logan who's still watching after Jess. "Don't follow me." She turns and walks away. Why was she doing this? Wasn't that what she wanted after all this time? For him to go away? God, she was pathetic. She runs out to the parking lot and looks around. "Jess!" She spots him getting in his car. She hurries over and stops when she reaches the driver side. "I thought you'd be gone by now." She starts just to break the silence.

"Nope."

"Sorry about that." She apologizes.

"What?"

"For, just…everybody being there. Their reaction. Logan especially, I don't know."

"Huh." Again one word.

"I see you're back to your old self." She says bitterly rolling her eyes. He pulls out a pack of cigarettes from the glove compartment and offers one to her. She shakes her head. "You know I don't smoke."

"Huh." He puts it in his mouth and lights it. "Blondie know that?"

She can see where this is going. "Stop it."

"What?" He asks innocently.

"I know what you're trying to do and its not working." Rory warns him.

He faces her. "Well, I don't. Please fill me in, what am I trying to do?"

Rory folds her arms. "You know."

"Obviously I don't I was just asking a question about your boyfriend." Rory sighs. "He is still your boyfriend, right?"

Rory glares and walks off. "Okay, you can leave now." She gets as far as the middle of the street before turning and walking back. "I don't even know why I came out here." She mumbles.

"I don't either. So please, enlighten me. Why did you come out here?" He gets out of the car.

"I don't know! I thought maybe…" She sighs and looks down. "…that we could start over, maybe try to be—"

Jess snorts. "What? Friends? What you'd come out here and convince me to go back in there where all us would become best buddies and see the error of our ways? That's bullshit, Rory! You know it is."

"That's not true."

"Is that really what you think, because I really can't see me and Lorelei planning birthday parties together or me and your grandfather talking at one of your grandmother's ridiculous parties with her friends from the DRA!"

Rory forces herself not to smile, not because he called the DAR Daughters Revolution of America but because she completely agreed with him. "I know and I'm not asking you to do that." He sighs and outs the cigarette in his hand. "I just want things to go back to normal."

"This is normal for us, Rory! One minute we're doing fine and the next someone screws it up." He laughs. "We're screwed up."

Rory looks around. "Maybe that's not such a bad thing."

He looks at her and smirks. "Maybe." Beat. "Look, maybe my coming here was a mistake." He opens the car door and looks back at her for a response but doesn't get one. "Was it?" He prompts.

Rory opens her mouth to respond but doesn't know what to say. She shrugs her shoulders. "…I don't know."

He nods. H wasn't really expecting an answer anyway. "Okay." He gets in the car.

She finds herself trying to think of something to say just to keep him here. Anything. "Do you remember the movie 'Serendipity'?" He looks at her confused. "I think that's more along our field. We keep finding each other." Beat. "Unintentionally, too."

Understanding dawns on him. "I remind you of John Cusack?" He smirks.

She smiles. "At least its not the 'Must Love Dogs' John Cusack."

"So I should be thankful, huh." He nods slowly. He notices Logan standing on the next side of the road. "I should probably go, your boyfriend's watching."

Rory looks behind her and sees Logan. She turns and faces him and takes a deep breath. "I want to want you."

Jess sighs. "Rory." He warns.

She ignores him. "Every time I look at him, I see you. I wander if things had happened differently…" She trails off. "…if I had written to you in Washington, if I had made sure you went to class or, slept with you in Kyle's bedroom…" Her voice softens.

He clenches his jaw. "Rory, don't."

"…if I hadn't gotten off the bus that day or if I said 'yes' that night you showed up at my dorm or…hadn't stopped the kiss in Truncheon…" She continues anyway.

"Rory, stop." He says harshly.

"No, I'm just, trying to figure out if you'd still be here. Instead of Logan." She signals over her shoulder. Jess sighs. "Would you? Would we still be together?"

"It doesn't matter, you know that." He speaks up finally.

"It does to me."

"Well I can't answer that." Beat. "Maybe next time."

"How do you know there'll even be one?"

"Because," He shrugs it off. "It's us."

Rory smiles. "Now that was very John Cusack of you."

He chuckles. "Don't tell anyone." The next time he looks Logan's gone. "Shouldn't you go find him?" He signals behind her.

She doesn't turn around. "Would you?"

"Was that a rhetorical question?" He laughs.

Rory rolls her eyes indiscreetly. "Bye Jess." She turns and walks off. She doesn't turn around until she reaches the side of the building, for fear of not being able to walk away again, he's already driving off at this point. She sighs at the thought of having to face everyone and heads to her car instead. She'd be better off calling Lorelei from her cell and letting her know where she was. She doesn't say much when Lor answers, only 'I'm outside'. When Lor tries to broach the subject she promises to explain later and hangs up before Lorelei can say anything else. Putting her phone down she notices a package on the seat next to her. She looks around cautiously before opening it. She sighs seeing the necklace from Jess. Then smiles seeing two words on a slip of paper: Say nothing. She didn't exactly have to tell them anything. He was 'just Jess'. She finally understood what 'It is what it is' meant. This was them.

**A/N: Review, review, review!!! Please, would it make a difference if I pouted? Lol.**


End file.
